It's that time of year again to get organized and make New Year's resolutions. People decide on things they want to organize, accomplish, improve upon, change or continue to do. I think that they are a bunch of nonsense. Because year after year I got so hung up in trying to do better, lose weight, get organized or reach an expectation that I had set for myself that I wasn’t seeing life for what it was. A time to enjoy the simple things that can turn into something extraordinary. I used to make News Year's resolutions, to lose weight, get organized, and do better. I lost sight of why I wanted to change or do better and focused on the goal. That’s hard to do. I never understood why it was so hard. To me, it seemed simple, make a goal and accomplish it. What was stopping me?
In the beginning, I was highly motivated to lose weight, when I really should have been focused on eating healthier. Losing weight during the winter when it's cold outside is unrealistic. I’ve been told over and over again about things that I want to accomplish or do, but they are unrealistic. When I was younger I wanted to be a nurse. I had such wonderful relationships with the school nurses and nurses at the doctor’s offices that I decided I wanted to be that person. Someone who helps others feel better when they don’t feel good. Unfortunately, I was told that is an unrealistic goal as I can't use my hands, can’t see and I can’t do anything in a hurry. I was reminded of all the things my disability prevents me from doing. I realize now that I am a nurse of sorts and I am helping other people just in a different way. If I could understand how unrealistic that was and see that the goal can be accomplished in a different way why can’t I lose weight? Why can’t I see how unrealistic losing weight in the winter can be?
I recently ran into a friend. She told me about an article she had read about the history of New Year's resolutions. They go back a long time ago before the Julian Calendar that we use today. March was when the spring equinox occurred and they celebrated the New Year. It was a time for growth and new beginnings. The winter was time for recharging our bodies through hibernation, just like many animals do. Resolutions were simple, return items that were borrowed, pay off debt and reaffirm loyalty to the new king. News Year's resolutions were about serving others not ourselves. Today's resolutions serve ourselves. Don’t we all have more motivation in the springtime, when the days are longer and the weather warmer? Would it make more sense and be more successful if we made them in March instead of giving up by March?
I am not alone, less than 10% of the people that make New Year’s Resolutions actually keep them. Maybe there is something to be said about making a resolution to serve the greater good instead of myself. I always find it easier to help others, offer my advice or opinion, or go out of my way to make people happy. I rarely do that for myself I tend to be generous, kind, and selfless. So why do I make goals that focus on me? I don’t look to be the center of attention nor pat myself on my back when I do something good for others. It's the feeling of helping that makes me feel good about what I did. I’m not looking for a trophy, besides they are dust collectors. I always feel guilty when I throw away a trophy or award. So by organizing my closet and selling it at flea market I cleaned out my closet a gotten rid of things others can use.
That’s an interesting one. I need my chair for mobility. I depend on it for everything. If it is broken, I go nowhere. If it isn’t charged, I am dead in my tracks. If it doesn’t fit, I can’t get in. Without my wheelchair, I would be a couch potato. Then I would really need to make a resolution to lose weight! I recently got a new wheelchair. The only problem is it is 28” wide compared to my old chair which was 27” wide. You may think that an inch doesn’t make a big difference, but it does. I couldn’t fit into my van without being wedged into the gap between my seats. Recently, I had to think of different ways to get into my family's home without scratching the cabinets. I must say though thankfully I have seat elevation because without it I would have never fit into the house. (I was elevated above the countertop so that I could clear the cabinets.) My father would have been screaming at my mother and she would have been snarky with him all in front of the family that we just wanted to spend time with. It would have started the weekend off with drama that wasn’t necessary. With the help of the seat elevation, which my mom fought tooth and nail for we were able to avoid world war three and I was successfully able to enjoy my family. My wheelchair didn’t stop me but it did make it challenging and required me to think outside the box. Being in a wheelchair has taught me that you need to be prepared to think outside the box and change direction. Something to consider to accomplish my New Year’s Resolutions.
Resolution or not resolution, that is the question.
So as usual by the time I finish putting my thoughts together, I realize something. I don’t have to make a resolution to do something for myself I can include both myself and others in the resolution and maybe be more successful. I can organize any time of the year it doesn’t have to be now. I can eat healthier and get prepared for when the weather is nicer. I can take the time to hibernate and ponder my goals. Finally, goals need to be flexible, setting unrealistic expectations only sets you up for failure. So I am not going to make resolutions and just be the best person I can be all the time.
Thank you for reading until the end!
This is the view from my wheelchair, where miracles can make a difference. Always Strive for the Impossible. Come back next week to see where we were when the pool was on fire and more about my experiences and The View From My Wheelchair.